Three years ago, I started coaching a group of wide-eyed, fairly hesitant sixth-grade girls. They were freshly launched into middle school and already asking some big questions. Who am I? Who am I supposed to be? Am I like everyone else?
They represented six distinct friend groups – some sporty, some a little more artsy, some bold, some reserved, but it didn’t matter – they showed up week after week, not for popularity or points, but for something deeper. They connected not through cliques or common interests, but through vulnerability. They shared wins, losses, tears, laughs and a lot of snacks. They learned to listen to one another, lift each other up, and, most importantly, how to have each other’s backs without losing themselves.
“They connected not through cliques or common interests, but through vulnerability.”
The coaching in numbers:
3 years (originally planned to be 1 semester but the kids and parents kept begging for more)
6 friend groups
19 girls
47 coaching principles
70 hours together
342 promises kept
1 tight community built
100% of them experienced an increase in healthy social emotional markers
The coaching in words:
“I can now walk up to a lunch table with any girl from coaching and I know she will welcome me.”
“My promises made me more confident.”
“I now feel worth it.”
“I never knew I could have so much control over my life and my thoughts.”
“I will use what I learned for the rest of my life.”
The coaching in impact:
“My daughter’s confidence, poise and patience is a direct result of this coaching work and these girls.”
“My daughter’s whole frame of mind and attitude on all things was better when she was doing the coaching program with you.”
“This program provided my daughter with skills and perspectives that will benefit her for the rest of her life.”
The coaching in principles:
Get in the Driver’s Seat of your Life
Self-Worth
Champion Communication
Thoughts & Beliefs
Body, Friends, Time, Money, Sports
Traits, Triggers, Regrets, Gossip
and more…
So what really happened in those three years of coaching?
They grew up. Together. In a world that often tells girls to compete, compare and conform… they built something way better: connection, confidence and community.
Here’s to high school, girls!
Casey Seidenberg is Human Better EDU’s Program Lead and Executive Life Coach. She leads our popular Take Charge of Your Life course for Middle Schoolers and High Schoolers. She also works with graduate-level educators to Kindergarten teachers and everything in between. Email Casey at casey@humanbetteredu.org
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